A teacher asked her students to use the word “beans” in a sentence. A girl said: My father grows beans. A boy said: “My mother cooks beans. A third student said: We are all human beans. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How
A thief put a man at gunpoint and said, “Give me your money.” The man, shocked by the sudden attack, said, “You can’t do this, I’m a congressman!” The thief replied, “In that case, give me MY money!” Please follow and like us: Please rate
A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. Shoplifter (To the manager): Listen, I know you don’t want any trouble either. What if I just buy this watch and we forget about this? Manager agreed and told him
Guy (To birthday guy): Hey, happy birthday. Birthday Guy: Thanks. Guy (To birthday guy): So what did you get on your birthday? Birthday Guy: I got older. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would you rate this joke?
A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were in a small private plane, when suddenly an emergency was declared as the plane’s engine developed some problem. inspite of the best efforts from the pilot, the plane started going down. Finally the pilot
Son: Dad can I have $50? Dad: $50. Do you think money grows on trees? Son: What is money made of? Dad: Paper. Son: And where does paper come from? Dad: Takes out his wallet and gives $50 to his son without a single word.
My friend thinks he is too smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would you rate this joke?
Kid: Can i go pee? Teacher: After you sing the alphabets. Kid: a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z Teacher: Where’s “p”? Kid: It went down my
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that? Man: That’s the skeleton of an old king. Tourist: And who’s the smaller skeleton next to it? Man: That’s the skeleton of the same king when he was a child. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would
Yesterday my mixer stopped working, so i went to my neighbour to borrow theirs. They asked me to use the mixer in their house only, so i did. Today, my neighbor came to borrow my broomstick, so I asked them to use it in my
Boy: I think you look too pretty. Girl: Thanks Boy: I wish there was something between us. Girl: Me too. Boy: Really? Like what? Girl: A wall. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would you rate this joke?
A man wrote to the bank: “My cheque was returned with remark ‘Insufficient Funds’. I want to know whether it refers to mine or the bank.” Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would you rate this joke?
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field as opposed to circumventing it? I need to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Definitely, please go ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even
A bus full of ugly people met with an accident and all the people in the bus died. As the people of the bus entered heaven, god provided them with one wish that will be fulfilled. The first person said, “Make me beautiful”, and it
There were these two professors insisting over which one had the dumbest child. Each professor thought his was the dumbest. The first professor says, “Let me demonstrate it to you. Hello Jake! (Jake rushes to his dad) I don’t know whether I left myself at
One of the guests (while being angry) calls the waiter and shouts at him, “Why there are no chairs at our table?” The waiter replies calmly, “I’m sorry sir, but you only booked one table.” Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both the man and his wife decide to keep it as a secret for their kids (a boy and a girl) to guess what kind of meat it is. As they all
As the old man lies dying in his bedroom, and the family discusses funeral arrangements. Son: We’ll make an enormous arrangement with more than 500 people gathering and 50 limos. First Daughter: Why you want to waste so much money like that? We will invite
Son: Dad, would you like to save some money? Dad: I certainly would, son. Any suggestions? Son: Sure. Why not buy me a bike, then I won’t wear my shoes out so fast. Please follow and like us: Please rate this How would you rate
A man being robbed by two criminals set up a huge fight. Finally the man was overpowered by the criminals and the criminals took his wallet. Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the astonished criminals asked him, why did he set up such
A purse snatcher was on trial in a court. as the victim saw him, she said, “Yes he is the one. i can’t forget his face at all.” Upon hearing this, the culprit bursts into laughter and said: You couldn’t see my face, lady. I
You may be surprised to know that a lot of non-living things can be categorized as male or female. Following are few examples: FREEZER BAGS Male, because they hold everything in, except you can see directly through them. PRINTERS Female, because once turned off, it
A drunk man gets on the bus at late night, lurches up the passageway, and sits beside an elderly woman. She glances at the man up and down and says, “I have news for you. You’re going straight to hell!” The man bounces up out
A sales agent presents a box of cigars to the manager of the manufacturing plant. Manager: No, thank you. I tried smoking a cigar once and I didn’t really like it. The sales agent presents his show case and after that, wanting to secure a
Sad and devastated, the guy entered into the prison for the first time in his life. Another prisoner who looked as if he belonged to the prison since ages said, “Don’t be upset son. Look at me, I am old and crippled. You’d never trust